Bittersweet seems to be the only word that gives even a tiny glimpse of how I feel about this time to say goodbye. I recently read a blog with the most eloquent words and truth. As I read her words, I felt as if she was writing my heart....
"It’s always a journey for me to look back on the ways in which God has
brought different people in and out of my life, and as I examine closely, I am
able to see glimpses of the purposes of those relationships in relation to
God’s plan that he is daily unfolding in front of me. Every tear has lead me to
a different joy and to a new song."
Her words are just beautiful. That specific line really struck a chord with me, and reminded me of one of my all-time favorite praise songs, Desert Song. I will always love this song because no matter what is happening in life, in the desert when its hard or in the harvest when blessings are abundantly clear, it reminds me to simply praise the Lord.
"All of my life, in every season, You are still God.
I have a reason to sing. I have a reason to worship."
From the beginning of the semester, my heart has been rooted in thankfulness.
I'm thankful God kept four of my best friends together during a difficult transition back to JMU for a 5th year.
I'm thankful for the opportunity to work this year- the ups and downs and the skills I've learned.
I'm thankful for the incredible experiences throughout this semester - adventures with friends, visits to/from family and friends, building new relationships, a beautifully encouraging Bible study and so much more.
I'm thankful God placed me in an incredible classroom to teach and love kids, and that His Hand was visibly working there.
I'm thankful to be here for a 5th year to gain all of these incredible memories.
I'm thankful for God's sovereignty, His peace, His love, His grace, His forgiveness, and how He has taught me and humbled me this semester.
I'm thankful for His great plans ahead and for working in His mysteriously wonderful ways to prepare the way. (Obviously, I do have some absolutely incredible things ahead... The best probably is that in a little less than 7 months I will be Mrs. Stephanie Ching!!)
Countless verses have come to mind reminding me of the plans He has for me and it's so exciting to see how God will continue to mold me. My heart just doesn't know quite how to let go....I know that so many others have these same feelings whenever there is a time to let go of something you deeply cherish. Over the past month, I have prayed for His peace, comfort and just the strength to embrace each day and to love deeply. He is ever-present, reminding me of His grace this semester and I am just filled with immense gratitude that (thankfully) counter-acts the sadness that my heart is drawn towards. I have still shed many tears, and I'm sure I still will as emotions come when its time to leave. I will undoubtedly dearly miss these people, this place, and this time. Yet I know He has captured my heart during this journey at JMU, and as long as I seek His face, I will be satisfied in Him in any situation.
"I'm running to You arms, the riches of Your love will always be enough."
- Forever Reign by Hillsong (another all-time favorite!)
